Si Mamang Pulis

Hi Anytime Now,

m one of your fans interms in giving advise,

anyway i have this problem witrh my MU which is he is policeman in our community, he is so sweet, before when he is still studying we always see each other, sharing some happy moment, giving inspiration to evryone, enjoying our both c0mpanys and also sharing some affection or rather i say SEx, but this day was ended when he become a registered police, and also when there someone who gets his attention,,, i new the fact that i dont have any right to do some action because in the first place we are just MU, and i dont want to be kontrabida in his life, but he alwys hurting my feelings when i saw him txting, chating with that individual, then,

what should i do.........

Thanks!

Love Or Sex

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Hi Love Or Sex!

Thanks for being a "fan" of my advice gig. Seriously, it feels good knowing someone regularly comes in to check what I write. All the while, I thought it was just me who reads my own stuff. So there you go, biggest thanks!

Regarding your question, we have to establish first what "MU" means. Literally, it stands for Mutual Understanding. But we have to realize that "mutual understading" can mean many things. In your set-up with Mamang Pulis, what is it really that you have agreed upon? You can have a mutual understading when it comes to sex, or companionship, or dating, or maybe all of these. It is important that you know the scope of this understanding that you both share.

You have all the right to feel jealous. You can be hurt for all you want. That is normal. I can see that you're starting to think that you are falling deeply for this person and it is normal to feel when a threat of losing him comes along the way.

Thing is, you have all the right to feel all these things but you only have the right to limit what you feel to yourself. As you have said, you do not have any formal set-up on where you stand.

Lastly, as I always say in almost of the advice I give, life is a choice. If you think that you want him so much in your life, then go run the extra mile and tell him. Tell him what you feel and tell him that you want him to stay to with you. Now, after you've said your piece, the choice is his to make and all you can do is condition yourself to accept whatever his answer would be.

Reality bites and it bites hard. Before you make any decision, contemplate first on what you really feel for him. Are you feeling that way because you have strong feelings for this cop or its just that it hurts your ego that after all that you've had, someone else will have him and its like you've all been used up. Whatever it is that you truly feel, it is always up to you to make things happen.

Thanks for asking and I look forward to hear from you more.

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